Sexual Issues: Advice for Students

Even among fit and healthy young people, sexual problems are nowhere near as rare as you might think. There are a range of issues that can make sex tricky or uncomfortable, with the possible causes being physical, psychological or a combination of both. Here are some tips that can help with some of the most common issues, but don't be embarrassed to go to a medical professional such as a GP if you have any concerns.

Premature ejaculation is when men come too quickly, particularly when this happens frequently enough to spoil enjoyment. It's much more common than people realise, particularly among younger men, and it seems to have both psychological and physical causes. There are several premature ejaculation cures, sprays and gels that can help desensitise the penis to limit the problem. It's also worth taking a different approach to sex: either try much more foreplay before intercourse to make sure you both get pleasure or, if you are feeling particularly energetic, try stroking each other to orgasm first and then having intercourse later on.

Erectile dysfunction, also known as impotence, is when men have trouble getting or keeping an erection. It can be psychological, which becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, but it certainly doesn't mean the man doesn't find a partner attractive! There are also some medical causes, which are often related to blood circulation. If it happens only when you are with a partner, the best solution is to take your time, relax, and try not to make a big deal of it. If you aren't able to get an erection even when trying to masturbate, it may be worth checking things out with a doctor just to be on the safe side. There are medical treatments available, such as the famous Viagra, but you should always seek medical advice first. You may find excessive alcohol can cause one-off problems with getting an erection: even Shakespeare wrote that alcohol "provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance"!

Dyspareunia is the technical term for women finding intercourse painful. It's actually far more common among younger people than older women. The most common form of "lighter" pain is a lack of natural lubrication, usually because you aren't stimulated enough before intercourse. You can help reduce this problem with lube -- and it can make sex much more pleasurable -- but don't use this as a substitute for foreplay, and remember that you mustn't use oil-based lubricants with condoms as they can damage the latex. If you are feeling pain regularly, or it is an intense pain, check with a doctor or gynaecologist as there may be a more serious medical problem.

Women having trouble orgasming is another problem. The main issue is that everybody responds to stimulation differently: to put it crudely, we've all got the same buttons, but the combination isn't always the same! Don't be afraid to experiment with masturbation to work out what does it for you and share this with your partner: don't be scared to tell them exactly what you want! Remember that some positions may work better than others, and often the easiest way for a woman to come may be from stroking or oral sex rather than intercourse. If you are struggling to come while masturbating, try experimenting with vibrators, but do go to a sexual health expert if you are worried.

It's not uncommon for even younger people to experience a lack of sexual desire, even when in a strong and healthy relationship. It can be caused by excessive use of drugs or alcohol, by some hormonal problems including when taking certain medicines, and by psychological reasons such as stress or depression. It is possible for habitual drinkers to experience alcohol withdrawal symptoms when they suddenly stop drinking alcoholic drinks. Don't be embarrassed to see a GP if you think this is becoming a problem: he or she will be able to refer you to a specialist if needed.